Thursday, January 3, 2013

Case of the Missing Chocolates

Something was amiss. Lady Anonymous sniffed the air, her nose catching the scent of deception. She slowly stood, glancing around her as she followed the smell to make sure no one was following her. 
The cupboard door was suspiciously open! Lady Anonymous's heart raced as she pulled the door the rest of the way open. Nothing seemed to be amiss, but then Lady Anonymous looked towards the box of expensive chocolates she had received from her lover three months prior. She lifted the lid... opened the box...
the chocolates were missing!

My family really cares about dessert. And we get defensive and territorial about it. As you can probably imagine, this does not bode well for the local bulimic. I often take food that's not meant for me and then try to pretend I didn't do it. Everyone knows I took it, even though no one knows I'm bulimic, but as long as I say I didn't take it I don't get in trouble, I just feel guilty. 
I took the chocolates. People got mad. I pretended I only had a few when in fact I probably had like ten. I hate myself for doing things like this. There's no excuse for thievery, even though I don't really consider it stealing because the chocolates belong to the family. 
I want to leave. I want to curl up in a ball and hide. 


  1. Oh Emily I can relate so much
    I too have stolen food

    From my family, friends and from shops
    It's like an addiction we are stealing to feed
    And the guilt and shame kills me
    I hate what I've become
    But we have to remember that it's not really us
    It's the eating disorder that drives us to do these things

    Try not to beat yourself up
    We all do it
    This just another horrible part of bulimia
    It's not cute
    It's not fun
    But we live this way every day

    Stay strong Katie
    I have no doubt that you are a good and caring person
    Don't let your illness tell you otherwise

    Take care x

  2. Ugh, its horrible when someone confronts you about food gone missing, we all know what happened so why talk about it? My brother called me out once and since my family doesn't talk about anything unpleasent or any feelings it was very strange for it to even be brought up. I still feel horrible now when I finish off something and my husband says something. What don't people get? I am a binge eater food will disappear sometimes. Food is my drug.

  3. In the heat of the moment none of us think about what we do or the consequences...I've done much worse than just eating whats not mine...actually I'm gonna make a post about that. But you're right there is no excuse, at least you have a lot of people here who know what it feels like and that actually you cant do really much to avoid things like that, bulimia is stronger.. you're a wonderful caring person, that's all that matters. Food will come and go...
    Stay strong..xx

  4. Thanks everyone :) Your comments really made me feel better about the whole situation. We're so lucky to have each other for support!


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