Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Everything Good Happens After 2 AM

“I’m not tired anymore.”
“Me neither.”
I looked at him and smiled.
“We should go to a bar and get me drunk.”
“Yeah, I have nothing going on tomorrow, and I’ve been meaning to try it.”
“So where do we go?”
“I vote my apartment because we have booze.”

I was wearing my black salsa dress and my sexy new black dancing shoes. I’d straightened my hair earlier and I hadn’t known what to say when someone implied I was going on a date.

He poured some drink and apple juice into a cup for me. Two shots, with a straw. I drank a sip and grimaced. But then I finished the entire thing. And one more shot for good measure.
“I’m not drunk. See, I can walk in a straight line!”
“I’m surprised you can, actually.”
I flopped down on the couch and rested my head on his lap.
“You’re really nice. And I would say that even if I weren’t drunk.”
“You’re really nice too.”

I dropped something on the floor. What it was I can’t remember, but when I got down on my hands and knees to pick it up, I collapsed in a heap on the carpet.
“I think I need to throw up…”
As he handed me the wastebasket I considered putting my fingers down my throat to speed up the process, but luckily I restrained myself. The sour odor of vomit filled my nostrils as I heaved up some of the alcohol. He gently pulled my hair out of my face.
“It was all worth it!”
He got a blanket and put it over me. And then we lay down on the floor and I just tried to forget about the swelling sensation that was my head.

I forget what we talked about. Did we talk at all? I was spinning and all I can remember is that his hand was around my waist, his fingers intertwined with mine.

“Want to move?” he asked.
I was thinking the couch.
“My bedroom.”
He got up and started moving things off his bed. I crawled over and somehow managed to hop in, even though every part of my body felt like it weight a thousand pounds.
He climbed in next to me and again put his hand around my waist.
“I guess I’d better not throw up any more,” I whispered.
“You’ll be okay.”
“I know.”

I didn’t sleep. I was in a twilight state, aware of my surroundings because the adrenaline was keeping me awake, but I could barely move. His hand softly stroked my leg, all the way up to my thigh.
I felt safe. I felt protected. I felt loved in a way that made my spine tingle.

Somehow when I left the next morning, I was unkissed. How do you spend the night sleeping next to someone who is clearly flirting with you and not kiss them? How do you spend three hours of the morning talking with that person in the same bed, now knowing that she likes you even when she’s sober, and not kiss her? How does she get away with pressing her forehead against yours and slightly nudging you upward… without you kissing her??

Getting drunk was worth it. I’ll never do it again. 


  1. He's a good guy and respects you. That's how you go all night without a kiss. That happened when I first met this new guy. We talked until 6:30 am and he asked if I just wanted to stay so I did. He told me later he could tell I had a bf so he tried to respect my boundaries. That's what good guys do. :) getting drunk isn't so bad if you don't slam drinks and get to the throw up point. Gotta drink your water during.

    I'm excited that things are beginning to unfold for you dear.

  2. How do you have a night like that, unkissed? You just do. And it leaves you electric, always wondering what more there is. But once it happens, a bit of that spark, a tiny bit of that passion is gone. Because you don't have to wonder anymore.

    It kills you, but I love nights like those.

  3. This comment has been removed by the author.

    1. Crap, sorry, went to add another comment and accidentally deleted the first. I might just drop you an email in the morning instead. xx

  4. Saying the same as the other wise ladies here, he respects you (and himself) and he cares for you because he took care of you, not used you. Throwing up is not fun when it's related to alcohol, well it's not fun anyway, but particularly in that state it's not fun.

    Just being close to someone can be more intimate than actually doing something, so I'd take that any time.

  5. Maybe he is thinking the same and waiting for you to kiss him..

  6. I'm terrified of getting drunk again, but I kind of know what you mean by: 'Getting drunk was worth it. I’ll never do it again.'

    About no kiss. Maybe he was being a gentleman and didn't want to take advantage of you being drunk? He obviously cares about you and respects you enough not to push the relationship too fast. But no kiss doesn't mean no chemistry - it sounds like you guys got really close, and that is vital in a relationship. You need to dip your toes in to test the water first before diving straight in and finding it's not the right temperature for you to be able to endure.


Thanks for commenting! I appreciate it :)